What kind of a world would we live in, I wonder, if parents treated their children with the respect that they give to any stranger.
Ive just heard people say the absolute stupidest, meanest, most unthoughtful stuff to their kids lately. Its almost as if we dont realize that they are people too and deserve the same basic decency as everyone else.
Think about it. If your spouse falls down you dont tell them "You're fine, get back up." You ask if they are ok, you go to help them up. If your friend is having a rough day and overreacts to some situation you don't tell her "Well someone is cranky today arent they?" No, you give her the emotional support she needs, you listen to her vent a bit. If you are upset at a co-worker's or employee's behavior you dont call him out in front of everyone, you discuss it in private.
I know that kids are kids, and that we are adults, and that because of that we are on a level above them in a way. But still, I think the world might be a little better if maybe we gave a little respect. Little things like not embarrassing them by sharing information you know they dont want shared, asking their thoughts on the little things that affect their life so much, treating their emotions as real, their opinions as valid.
Just think how amazing it felt as a child when an adult listened to you, I mean really listened to you as if you had something to say that was worth hearing. Maybe it shouldnt have felt so amazing...maybe that's just the way it should be.
Anyways, Im working on red velvet cake balls for V-day so I better run (I was going to make petite fours and then decided it was WAY too much work, if you have 5 hours or so I cant recommend this recipe enough but unfortunately I don't have that kind of time this year).
Keep your eyes out for some future posts I want to do on Zeke's newest talents (including knowing his colors!!) and my newest obsession with wanting a "sister-wife" Big Love syle (honestly the whole sharing Josh thing is mattering less and less in mine eye...)
3 comments:
I continue to be amazed at your wisdome. We did give our kids respect, including them in all the adult discussions, etc., at it really made a difference, I think, in their maturing process. There is a confidence, self-esteem, etc., etc., that is conveyed with respect much more than most of us think. *Beautiful* writing. Love You g-pa
Funny, I made red velvet cake balls too! :) I agree with giving your kids respect and know I fail all the time, I think it's really important though to practice now when they don't notice before they're old enough to know.
I thought you made a very valid point about respect. Read it to Dan and he remarked, "Well, if your friend fell down repeatedly, always crying like dying, but never really hurt, you might not be so sympathetic for your friend either." I thought it was also a valid point. I make a point to mean what I say to my kids and not treat them like less of a person than they are, however, acknowledging that they are still developing and may push the envelope sometimes.
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