Here are a bunch of random pictures from the last week. Zeke hasn't been sleeping well at night, it's either a tummy flu, a head cold, OR teething. Don't you love that about teething? It can cause fever, a runny nose, a runny diaper, and irritability....just like every sickness known to man. Anyways, no sleep for Zeke means no sleep for me, which means I spend a lot of my day laying on the couch wishing I was dead, lol, and I've been feeling too sorry for myself to blog much.

Today he seems in a lot better mood though so I have hope for tonight. And even if tonight STILL sucks, Josh and I are going on a date Friday to see Harry Potter (sans Z, thanks Adria) so I will be feeling happy for myself tired or not.

Anyways...pcitures!
Here is Zeke at Audobon park getting a ride from daddy. He loves being pulled around in his wagon and only daddy lets him ride THIS way so its even more special. I buckle him in so he cant stand up.
We picnic there a lot and surprisingly Zeke will almost always stop to eat, standing up of course but still he's eating.
This is the Audubon splash pad or at least the small corner Zeke likes to play at. It must have been a different day because Zeke is in another pair of swim trunks but that's not that surprising, we are at that park at least twice a week and often more.


This is the cat Zeke and I have taken in. She's looking a lot healthier already, although I think she's still a little bony. She is getting a lot less jumpy too and even will let Zeke pet her now. I'm kind of hoping she has kittens again sooner or later, lol, (she just lost a litter, which was part of why she was so sickly) that way I can have INDOOR cats. The chances of Josh buying us a kitten are rather slim so I think that's my only hope. He grumbles enough about poor kitty who doesnt even come inside the house.

Last but not least, here are some construction pictures from when we helped Brad and Kim set up Preston's birthday present.
Zeke has a screwdriver in one hand and a fork in the other...all the tools a man needs.
They were both very helpful. Zeke is ALWAYS copying Preston and as soon as P started hammering Zeke had to hammer too, with his bare hand.

Oh rain...how I loath thee

I used to hate rain. Its so depressing and grey...and it makes me cold even when its not that cold inside.

But now I know that my hatred for rain used to be shallow and silly. Because now I have a toddler. An active toddler. And whenever it rains now I have to deal with Ezekiel switching back and forth from position 1. Crying at the sliding glass door and trying to open it, if he see's our cat outside he will also let out the occasional longing "kitty kitty!" and position 2. Crying at the front door and demanding "go go go, gotta go!", bringing me my shoes, his shoes, my purse, and anything else he thinks will get me ready to take him somewhere. It's interesting that he seems so sad to not go into the backyard and so angry to not go out to the car... And the whole thing is probably hilarious to my mother, since I remember also being completely unable to entertain myself at home. Heck...I still am.

Our weekend plans were a slight bust. I had hoped to go "practice camping", a 2 day ordeal just a few minutes from our house at the nearest state park to see how Zeke does. Unfortunately the state park was full. And yes, we have another state park only about 45 minutes away, but that one's campground is closed. :(

It's not a huge deal, as I'm 99% sure Zeke will LOVE camping and do beautifully on our trip in early August. The whole "practice" thing was really just a ruse to get Josh to agree to going camping last-minute. I actually just wanted to go camping. My house is dirty, and I think its lame to wait 2 whole months of summer to get away from it and spend some time in a place even dirtier. Especially after we never got to camp last year since Zeke was soo tiny.

Instead we spent a lot of Saturday at the park. Where Zeke stepped on a pine cone, cutting his foot up really bad, and I got overheated and almost passed out. Yeah...not really a trip to make me glad we didnt go camping. Sunday went off better. We found out our friends Kim and Brad were having trouble putting together a swing set playhouse they just bought Preston and we went over so Josh could help...and got fed as payment, which is always nice. Any day I dont make dinner is a winner in my book.

Next weekend will be better though. We are going to Prestons 2nd birthday party, and also finally getting around to Zeke's 1 year pictures. Then we have an empty weekend...hrm... Then we go on our 9 day trip to Boise, which will culminate in a camping trip with Josh's mom!!! If you cant tell, I'm REALLY looking forward to that one.

So that this post isnt mostly complaining I will tell a funny story about Z:

The other day I was folding laundry when I heard some dripping and giggling in the kitchen. I called out (nicely, because I wasnt sure of any fault yet) "Zeke what are you doing?" and suddenly he came running into the bedroom with his tippy cup and literally THREW it at me. The lid had come loose (it happens if you drop it) and was dripping. The look on his face was pure "its not my fault!" terror.

I am a resposible parent

I am a responsible parent.

For instance, when Zeke throws all of his crackers on the kitchen floor at snack time, I don't sometimes just leave them there...you know...in case he gets hungry later.

And I most definitely don't set an alarm some days for 5:00 so I can be sure to get dressed and do all the dishes before my husband gets home from work.

Nor have I put my son on a 2 outfit per day limit and just leave him naked for the rest of the day if he dirties that second outfit. I do as much laundry as necessary.

I also don't ever feed my one year old ramen noodle for lunch. We only eat healthy and organic thankyouverymuch.

And I certainly dont decide I can skip a bath, because after all, I just hosed him off in the backyard. I would never hose a child off in my backyard.

And I can GUARANTEE that I didn't do all of the above yesterday.

I am a responsible parent after all.

Blueberry updates

I kind of thought that now that I am 14 weeks and into my second trimester it was time for an update on our little Blueberry. It's strange to think that I am already 1/3 of the way there, this pregnancy hasn't really forced itself onto my consciousness like the last one. Maybe I have a little bit of a "been there, done that" attitude about it, and honestly it wasn't even that long ago. Sometimes I just feel like THIS pregnancy is just a continuation of the LAST pregnancy. True I had a good 9 month break but with breastfeeding the entire time it all feels like one giant hormone coaster.

I think when my hormones balance out Josh will fall in love with me all over again. Although who am I joking, does a woman's hormones ever really balance out?

Anyways, second trimester. My energy is coming back, slowly but surely, my nausea is fairly non existent unless I do something stupid like not eat all day and I feel a lot like this chick:

Because Im at that lovely stage where you dont really look pregnant, you just look like you've been putting on weight. Much like Zeke, Blueberry has been hanging out in my extremely roomy and apparently comfortable pelvis. Usually your uterus has popped over your pelvic bone by now causing your tummy to "pop". My kids like to just wedge themselves in there until they are forced out, though, causing me to pee everytime I sneeze. Yeah, you heard me.

Zeke lasted underneath my pelvic bone until a little after 20 weeks, at which point I could feel constant pressure at both hips and he was forced to sit in a more diagonal position in order to continue growing. And if there is one thing my first born loves to do, its grow, lol. Who knows how long this baby will last down there but he is wedged pretty tight as of last night. Cathy had to almost scewer me with her doppler to catch his heartbeat.

But he is healthy and lemony sized and being fairly kind to his mommy.

I better get offline though. I had a playdate planned for today, and when it was cancelled I got sulky and decided to stay on the internet all morning while letting my toddler drink a bottle naked in the livingroom. Yeah, I'm that kind of mom sometimes.

When I ran out of Facebook, emails, and news articles to read I lowered myself further by turnign to two of my absolute favorite wastes of time.

http://cakewrecks.blogspot.com/

http://awkwardfamilyphotos.com/

Nothing like bad family phtots and ugly cakes to while away my life...

A busy 3 day weekend

I love 3 day weekends. I love them more than anything else, except maybe the rare and delicious 4 day weekend.

THIS particular 3 day weekend was even better than expected. Full of sun and daddy time, equally warming.

Friday morning was spent at Audubon park. I forgot my camera, unfortunately, but Zeke took us from the splash pad, to the swings, to the slide, BACK to the swings again, with plenty of squirrel chasing in between. It's one of our very favorite parks, really close to the house and with tons of shade and Zeke and I go just about every week, if not a couple times in a week, but having daddy there made it extra special. Mommies just cant pretend they are being kicked in the face by your swinging legs as convincingly.

After the park we went home for a nap and spent the rest of the afternoon in a home-made tent. Or at least 2 members of our family spent the rest of the afternoon in a tent, one member was informed "no girls allowed".
We made home-made pizza and relished in the fact that all day had been FRIDAY, and a work day, except there was no work. Thanks America for being born!

Saturday was, of course, the 4th of July and as tradition holds we went downtown to Riverfront park to enjoy the sometimes bad live music, the horrendously thick crowds, the disgustingly greasy fair food, and the headache inducing fireworks. Just kidding, I actually love going downtown for the 4th of July. Even JOSH loves going downtown for the 4th. In our last 4 July 4ths (since we moved to Spokane) we have spent 3 down there (we went camping 1 year, a year I maintain HAD no 4th of July...even though it was an awesome camping trip) so it's officially a tradition. And a tradition I plan on maintaining.
Josh of course wore his 4th of July t-shirt. He actually insists that it is mere coincidence that out of those 3 4th of July's he has worn this same t-shirt all 3 times. I'm not sure if I believe him.

Zeke, of course had a blast. I think we were at the park for a total of 8 hours (we spend the whole day down there, usually arriving around 2 or 3 and not leaving until after the fireworks show at 10) and he was happy the entire time.

Riding on daddy's shoulders.

Flirting with various camera's.

Drinking strawberry lemonade.
Finding Crawdads in the river (Josh and I thought it was a lobster, lol.)

And of course playing in the fountains.

He was sooo brave in the fountains and he had such a great time that he wouldn't let us leave until he fell and bit his lip. Even then the entire walk back to our blankets he kept hugging Josh's head and kissing his ears. I think he was trying to say "thankyou".

He even stayed in a great mood all the way up to 10 when the firework show started, although I will admit he was getting really silly by the end there. You know the state when babies are so tired they just get really really silly and wont stop moving for fear of falling asleep standing? Yeah, we were there.

I think the fireworks themselves bored him, lol. He would look up from time to time but mostly he was just trying to get Adria to play with him. He also insisted that Adria hold his hand the entire walk to the car. He might be in love.
Sunday we RESTED. Josh and I were both soo tired. Zeke, on the other hand, was ready to go. As soon as he woke up he kept trying to lead Josh and I by the hand to the front door, "gotta go gotta go" he kept saying. Yeah right, kid. I think all this strawberry picking, seattle vacationing, and holiday weekending has gotten him a bit spoiled. And now we are thinking of doing a "practice" camping trip next weekend at the state park that's just 15 minutes from our house. I cant decide if I want to get rained out or not just so we can have a boring weekend, lol.

We DID venture as far as the backyard on Sunday, where Josh barbecued and Zeke rubbed dirt from an empty planter all over his naked body. Literally, he was rubbing it into his skin. Boys.
All in all an amazing weekend.

Ok I'm all ready to talk about Seatte

So we left Monday, probably around 11 I think. We had blankets, snacks, movies, and toys all packed up and we were ready to take on Seattle!

(arent their matching car seats cute? Kim and I have the same one, albeit in different colors.)

Zeke and Preston both had plenty of snacks to keep them busy for the drive and I must say it went better then I imagined it would. Zeke only slept about a half hour and he whined quite a bit at the end but never got hysterical.

Except I guess when he got scared of the shark, that is. You see Preston has one of those nifty DVDs that connects to the back of the seat, but Zeke has never actually been exposed to TV before. Well we put in Finding Nemo (Preston's fav) but then suddenly a half hour or so later Zeke is just screaming. When suddenly Kim realizes that the movie is at the scary shark scene. Oops. He also got a little upset during Cars when he's searching in the dark for Mac and cant find him. I guess Zeke isnt quite ready yet for the emotional rigors of Disney cartoons.

But all in all, an uneventful drive. I think it took us about 5 hours to get to Seattle. We checked into the hotel, went to a BBQ at Kim's sister-in-law's boyfreind's house (OMG the biggest most expensive house I've ever entered...with the best view of downtown Seattle not to mention the waterfront) and then found a park to play around in.

Then we went to the hotel and Zeke stayed up until almost 10 playing happily and enjoying a sucker on our bed.

We woke up at 8 and Preston maybe 15 minutes later so we got some of the continental breakfast at the hotel and got ready for the zoo.

(here are the boys finishing breakfast and watching cartoons while the mommies got ready)

I think we got to the zoo around 11 but already by noon Zeke was getting cranky and didnt want to be in his stroller anymore and by 1 he was having the tantrum of his little life so Kim was nice enough to agree to leaving for a little while for a nap and lunch. Both boys ended up falling asleep in the car so we took turns running into a cafe and ordering food to go. When we got to the hotel both boys woke up in excellent moods and ate pretty decent lunches so we headed back.

From that point on they were both happy as could be and we ended up seeing the entire zoo and staying until they closed at 6. I think it helped that when we went back I let Zeke take his bottle. Because yes, I am the kind of mother that lets her toddler drink out of a bottle all day if it will keep him happy.

I think the ice-cream sandwich also helped. You know, the one I bought for myself.
THIS is the treat I had bought for Ezekiel. Apparently it didn't look as good as mine. And I can assure you, it wasnt.

Dont think we were the only ones to enjoy snacks at the zoo though. We were kind enough to feed this giraffe as well. Zeke loved his long tongue, he kept sticking out his own at it.

He also loved the little birds in this bird exhibit. They were letting him get really close before they would fly away.

But I think I have to say his FAVORITE were the fish inside the bear exhibit. You know, the fish they put in there for the bears to eat. He was CRAZY about those fish.

Unless it was that random turned on hose he found.
Or the stool at the flamingo exhibit with an egg carved into it.
I'll admit he didnt pay much attention to the animals but I think he had a lot of fun.

Both boys were so sticky from their ice-cream that we decided we had to go BACK to the hotel again to get them washed up before we went out to dinner. Thank goodness we spent the extra money to be able to stay inside the city, right?

They played a game I think Zeke enjoyed a lot more than Preston.
It mostly entailed Preston carefully filling up little cups with water and lining them on the side of the tub and Zeke then knocking them back into the water.

After they were clean we went to Red Robin for a late dinner where both boys behaved beautifully. And by the time we were back to the hotel for bed it was 9:30 and Zeke was so tired that I was able to carry him to the room, take off his pants and shoes, and change him into a night diaper without him even stirring.

The next morning was our last day so we packed up to go, and then went down to Pike Place for an hour or so since we both wanted flowers. Also I'm pretty sure its illegal to be a tourist in Seattle without going to Pike Place at all.

Then we went out to the Children's Museum with the plan of staying until one or prefferably both of the boys were stone dead tired and maybe even having a melt-down. Let me tell you the Children's Museum in Seattle is AWESOME. From my experience at the museum here in Spokane I kind of figured I would just stay in the small under 3 section because all of the other stuff is way to advanced for Zeke.

Well yeah, they had a lot of advanced stuff but there were also numerous other sections that Zeke really would have really enjoyed. I say "would have" because before we could get to many of them Zeke found this.
Yeah...that is a water table.
And he REFUSED to play with anything else the entire time we were there after he saw it. Oh I distracted him for short periods with other things, he especially liked making faces in this mirror.
But he always headed right back to the water after a few minutes, and if I tried to take him out of sight of the water he would climb out of my arms as quick as he could and RUN back.

He even got mad because he couldnt climb INTO the water.
Of course eventually another little girl wanted to play in the water. Zeke first politely moved her hands away when she tried to touch "his" waterfall. But after I explained to him that he had to share the water, and the little girl proceeded to play away in "HIS" water...well let's just say that Zeke got that very special gleam in his eye and I decided that it was best to remove him from the situation before I was explaining to some poor mother why her toddler was crying.

Luckily at that moment Kim found me with the startling news that it was 2 o clock and we better get lunch and on the road if we were going to make it to Spokane that night.

Neither of the boys had the looked-for meltdown but let me tell you after eating and getting on the road they both passed out cold for a good 3 hours, which left Kim and I to chat very happily in the car.

We made it all the way back without any tantrums or excessive crying and learned a few valuable lessons.

1. 5 outfits for 3 days is not enough. I could have used with at least 1 more.
2. 3 days to see Seattle is also just not enough. I could have used at least 10 more, lol.
3. Little boys will get very attatched, even after only a few days. By that last day Zeke and Preston were both getting quite upset whenever the other one was out of sight.
4. Little boys will also rub off on each other. Zeke learned quite a few...interesting...noises on the drive back. Much to everyone's hilarity, maybe the kids werent the only deleriously tired ones.
5. Preston and Kim are perfect traveling pals. Thanks guys for going with us!

We are back and exhausted

Yep, we are back in Spokane. And let me tell you we had such an excellent time that we did NOT miss it. Seattle is, by far, the better city and there is just no arguing it. But we DID miss Josh, and our house, and our beds. So we are happy to be back. And after all that traffic, and all those high prices, and already knowing what a decent house in Seattle costs, I understand why we chose to live here, even if our Children's Museum is a sad sad shade of theirs. Still 3 days is not long enough to enjoy a city as awesome as Seattle and I definitely plan on going back soon.

I am utterly exhausted so I'm not going into details yet or post any of my amazingly cute photos. But I wanted to let everyone know that the trip went well, that none of my fears came into reality (we only had 1 rather small and easily napped away tantrum), and that we are safely home in the arms of our daddy/husband.

Oh and Kim and I are still friends. Even if Zeke was naughtier then Preston and we had made a deal to have equally ill behaved children. I forgive her.

going to Seattle

Zeke and I (along with good friends Kim and Preston) are going on a short trip to Seattle this morning. We are going to be there for 3 days (2 nights) and hit the Zoo, Pike Place, and the Children's Museum. Yipee!!!

My fears right now? What if Zeke wont sleep in the hotel and keeps all 4 of us awake (we are splitting a room)? What if Zeke screams the entire car ride (this sometimes happens)? What if Zeke decides he doesn't want to ride in a stroller and makes me carry him EVERYWHERE in my pregnant state, thus making me nauseous and throwing me into contractions (this also sometimes happens)?

Here is hoping that Zeke is a good and happy boy for our little vacation. Or at least that Preston matches Zeke's naughtiness. Lol.

It will probably be fine, and hey, even if it isnt I will survive to blog about it and you will get a good laugh. So win win.

Zeke's words are really coming along lately. His 2 big new ones are Herego (Here you go all smooshed together), which he says when he kisses me or hands me a toy and Bellyboogatubebu...... Which is belly button. He has the "belly" part down but then goes into some indistinct muttering after that.

He is getting really vocal though, which is exciting. If he's in the right mood he will try to repeat just about anything Josh or I say and I bet there are a good 20 words he remembers and uses regularly now. He knows Hello and Hi and Ball and Bottle, Kitty and Turtle and Momma, and Da and so many others. Now if only he would do any of that in front of strangers so I can show off... Or at the least he could finally learn nose. We've been working on that for a long time and he still confidently points to my nose when I ask and says "Ba."

It's truly summer

You know its summer when the strawberries look THIS good. Tonight I'm making some fruit leather and tomorrow...freezer jam. You gotta love about 6 pounds of strawberry goodness.

Zeke certainly enjoyed picking strawberries, though.
And of course gorging on said strawberries. I'm pretty sure he picked and ate a good 2 dozen.
And that was BEFORE he realized how much easier it would be to just glean off of what we had already picked.
An hour and about 7 dollars later we were heading home with that box full, though, despite Zeke's theft. This is SO a new family tradition.

We've had hints of summer even besides the strawberry picking trip we took today. Take Zeke's new study of the manly arts.

BBQing.
And dont forget lawn mowing.
And this last picture is just for fun. Zeke is starting to develop his sense of humor and he makes this face (while breathing rather hard) to make us laugh. It works every time.

We had kabobs

I think I'm going to discontinue WFDW for a while. Probably for the summer. We cook so little in the hot months, we mostly eat salads or sandwiches with fresh fruits and veggies and a whole lot of BBQ of course.

Although if you were just dying to know I WAS going to post our dinner of shish kabobs tonight. Made with lamb, as all true and pure shish kabobs are. And of course delicious zuchinni, mushrooms, tomato, bell pepper, and onion...oh my now I'm hungry again.

It's been a fun week this week. The weather is back to something livable and that always makes things easier. We've been outside pretty much non-stop, going on a just Zeke and I date to a local park on Teusday and then having our freinds Kim and Preston over to play in the backyard on Wednesday. They were both a lot of fun and inducing of great naps. I go to parks with friends so much more often then I go just Zeke and I that I forget how much fun it really can be. Dont get me wrong, I love sitting and chatting and getting that break but every once in a while its nice to focus completely on Zeke and play right along with him.

Today we are pretty indoor-bound being busy with our mindful mama's meeting but Josh asked me if I could make him and Zeke a picnic dinner for their "boy's night" date on Friday so it sounds like they are heading to a park. The boy's night went really well last week. It was cold and a little rainy so they went to the mall and Josh let Zeke lead the way and wander around everywhere (something I never allow, so I'm sure Zeke was having a blast), then they ate dinner at Qdoba where Zeke apparently "molested a quessadilla" (Josh's words).

Father's day went well too, since now I realize I never wrote about it. We had the special dinner on Saturday night (crab legs, baked potatoes, and rolls) since Sunday was our last EVER Sunday dinner with Josh, Jen, and Adria (the first two are leaving for Eugene and grad school this week). Sunday itself we skipped church (I know, naughty) to sleep in and relax. We had blueberry muffins and then went to Car Toys to get a new stereo installed. So Josh got a new sterio and 2 bags of socks. Lol. It's what he wanted. Zeke also got a bag of socks, just for being so cute :)

I have some fun pictures that I'll post later on this week. And next week I'm going to SEATTLE!!! Unless one of the boys get sick again....you're keeping Preston quarintined right Kim?

I never was a gymanst

I've been having a trying day. 99% of my frustration is centered around Zeke's new-found obsession with sticking his finger up my nose. Which I CANNOT STAND. I don't know why its such a big deal to me but it seriously drives me NUTTERS. It also leaves me at a complete blank as to what to do about it. It's not a serious enough offense to spank over. Yet I don't want to be taken down to my one year old's level in a sadly equal fight of him lifting his hand and me pushing it back down over and over again.

So I find myself back in the balancing act that is motherhood and realizing all over again that I never was a gymnast...I could never even learn a headstand.

I want to teach Zeke respect for my limits (as well as teach myself respect for my limits, we, as mothers, can only do and handle so much) as well as teach him respect for my body. Yet I don't want to fight over everything, I don't want to curb his curiosity, and I desperately want to be an example of the patience that I daily expect from him.

It seems like a big bag of worms to have been brought up by a baby sticking his fingers up his mommies nose but it's actually a subject I fret over often. Balancing.

Discipline is so much more than a simple set of do and donts and Josh and I more and more are looking around us and realizing that the values we want to instill in our children are no longer reflected in the world around us.

In today's world how do you teach a child respect? Respect for other's and respect for himself? How do you get him to open doors for women, not because they cant but because he should? How do you teach him to listen and to learn from his elders but also to think for himself at all times? How do you teach him to honor tradition but to also know that just because something has always been that way doesn't make it right? How do you teach right?

In a country like ours how do you instill in a small boy that winning isnt everything? That method is worlds more important than outcome and meaning more important than activity? How do you teach him, in a church like today's, to balance the love that Jesus taught with the bile that you so often see and hear coming from Christians? How do you teach him love and forgiveness and yet still teach him strong and steady morals?

How do you teach true Christian morals at all? They don't even seem to exist in the church anymore.

Josh and I so often worry and not only because we arent sure how to balance these lessons with parental patience, forgiveness, love, and fun. We also worry because we know that the best way is to be examples of them ourselves, and we know too well how our own balancing acts sometimes are.

Verse of the week

Its been a long time since I've done a verse of the week. My bible reading, I will admit, has been pretty sketchy the last few weeks. Before Zeke I was really really good at being disciplined. I meditated and read 10 chapters a day...well...religiously. I ended up getting thru a tiny bit more than the full bible a year. It wasn't that hard because I usually used my lunch break at work. Having a set time of day is really the key.

AFTER Zeke....its on and off. I will do great for a month but then all of a sudden I realize my only prayers are the little 5 minute ones I scatter thru my day (I've made habits, I pray in my head every time I get in the car, every time I prepare some food, every time I look in a mirror, ect. It works really well for a constant connect) and that I've only read about 5 chapters THAT WEEK, and none at all for a good 3 days in a row.

Its not even like I really dont have the time. I've always said that reading the bible is more important than watching House, more important than reading blogs, more important then reading whatever novel I am on. These are things I generally find time for. Yet I refuse to find time for the Lord. Heck, it's more important to read the bible then it is to keep this house clean. I know Josh would agree and not blame me for a sink full of dishes if he knew I used to time for a good prayer session.

I think at the very heart of it my alone and quiet time is just so much rarer, so much more valuable, then it used to be that these days I dont feel like paying the price of that hour or two. When it meant putting off my novel until later that day it was hard but easily done with a little discipline. When it means I wont get to read my novel AT ALL that day...or maybe even the next...well I am weak and selfish, I never said I wasnt.

Today was a bit of a sucess though and I was very graciously led to this verse "I am my beloved's and his desire is for me." in Solomon 7, verse 10. It's so comforting to know that it isnt up to us to find God, that we are His beloved and that He is searching for us. It is only up to us to allow ourselves to be found...and to stay found. Like Simon Tugwell says in his book Prayer, "Our hope is in His determination to save us, and He will not give in."

Im here and alive

I feel as if I havent had any time for my blog lately, and I have sooo many things I've wanted to post too. But first moving and then early pregnancy and then Zeke being sick has left me swamped to say the least.

But we are finished unpacking (have been for a while), Zeke's fever has been gone for a good 24 hours now, and I'm suddenly feeling a lot better this week, maybe not with energy to spare but surely with energy to survive thru the day (which hasnt always been the case the last couple weeks). So here is me, trying to re-commit to blogging.

I think it will go well.

Tomorrow Zeke and Josh start a new tradition, Friday night boy's night. It's going to serve a duel purpose...or maybe its really just one purpose that will slightly change. For now it's going to give me time for a Friday evening prenatal yoga class, so I can connect with this pregnancy and this baby...not to mention de-stress and exersize. I took the same class when I was pregnant with Zeke and mostly at that time I was thinking of staying in shape (and it DID help a lot in that area) but I found by the end of my pregnancy that I was hanging onto an emotional thread waiting for the next class and that it really helped me connect with my pregnancy.

I've tried time and time again to start a yoga practice at home but it's never quite the same. I can get into a great meditation routine solo if I try hard enough (and, you know, Zeke isnt around) but I never feel like I get as much out of the positions themselves without someone guiding me. And its just not the same de-stressing enviroment, doing yoga with a 1 year old watching.

So I get to go to Cara at Harmony Yoga again for her class. And the OTHER purpose of a Friday night tradition is that when the little blueberry DOES arrive Zeke and Josh will be in the habit of weekly solo time, allowing me to continue a tradition of destressing and connecting with my new baby. Not to mention giving Zeke some one on one time with a parent, which he will need. As blueberry gets a little older, Josh and I might even switch places every once in a while.

Its all very exciting.

Josh and I have also been thinking about names a lot. Our goal is to have 3 options for each sex. That way when Blueberry is born we have names set that we agree on but also the ability to pick a name that we think really "goes" with the baby. With Zeke we had it down to Ezekiel, Isaiah, or Gabriel. But really we were already leaning towards the first two because we decided last minute we didnt like the shortened "Gabe".

So far our favorite girl names are Adva and Miriam and our favorite boy names are Ezra and Jude (although Josh isn't fond of either boy name, he wont think up any he DOES like so there they are). I wrote them all on the fridge so that we can think about them. Zeke's name list changed so much over the months. Names crossed off and then later another added. What can I say? We take naming seriously.

We're also talking about middle names, which is new ground for us. Josh really had his heart set on Zeke's middle name being his dad's last name, Yergenson. It was so important to him that we only chose first names that went along with that and never even really considered any other middle names. The problem is I dont really take middle names that seriously, who ever uses them?, so I keep wanting to do something like Chaos or Rogue...or even Wolverine, lol, but also wonder if I should be more reasonable and pick some grandparents with good names...

Birthday Pictures

I'm supposed to be in Seattle right now. At the zoo. Having fun. Instead I am home in a filthy dirty house with a sick baby. Because first Preston, and then Zeke came down with an awful flu. And while Preston got sick in time for us to change our reservations at the hotel, Zeke did NOT get sick late enough for me to clean our house after the party.

Oh well. It's just a fever. Nothing really else worth mentioning. And its been going around town pretty heavy the last few weeks and isn't bacterial in nature so there's no need for antibiotics. And Zeke is always such a good boy when he's sick. Barely crying, he just wants to cuddle on the couch all day while he drifts in and out of sleep. When he's awake we read books and sing songs, when he's asleep I catch up on my own reading since he absolutely refuses to be left alone. It could be worse.

Saturday went really well, however. One of the few first birthday's I've ever attended where the birthday child didnt cry even once, lol. And here are some pics for your enjoyment. Of course I didnt even think of pictures until the important stuff happened so all I've got is presents and cake and none at all of kiddo's playing in pools or having a blast popping balloons, but oh well. I was enjoying myself.

We decorated the deck a bit.

And Zeke even showed some interest in unwrapping gifts.The cake turned out great.
Even if Zeke refused to feed it to himself and make a mess everywhere as is tradition. Brian was more than happy to feed it to him in the wagon that Mommy and Daddy bought him.