I knew a bit, but not the depth of it. Until Saturday.
And she has been very much in my thoughts and prayers since then. Why do we never reach out? Us mothers? Why do we never tell anyone when life gets a bit hard? Or really hard? Or near insufferable? Why do we never take care of ourselves?
2. The boys are playing outside in the rain, footie pajamas + rain boots + sweaters + hats + flashlights. It's adorable. When they come back in it will be all homemade cinnamon rolls and hot black tea (because my children love black tea and hate hot chocolate...because there is something wrong with them).
3. I spent some time this week figuring out the new Facebook. I hated it. I can see why they did it the way they did (although even THAT took an hour) but it wasn't serving my purpose very well.
Anyways, it ended up all for the better because it inspired me to really think about what my purpose on Facebook is...and to then reorganize it to better suit that.
Yesterday I finally implemented those "lists" everyone's been squawking about and yes, I think now I get it. My new plan now that I have my "close friend list" is to really only keep up with that. I decided the perimeters for being a "close friend" were A. that it was a relationship that I wanted to devote real time to fostering, and B. that the persons updates and links were positive to my life, not negative. It was surprising how often the two didn't meet and it took soul searching, and hard, hard deletions.
I tend to be addicted to friendships even when they aren't adding anything positive to my life. Facebook has, if anything, quadrupled the problem as its that much harder to let go. It isn't good for me, though, to have so many draining relationships, and so little time left over to spend on relationships that I wish were stronger.
Using the same "positive only" rule I even pared back my google reader subscriptions to 22! I'm so proud of myself.
Oh the time I'll have....
4. I hinted towards prayers and decisions to be made before. I can go so far as to say that Josh and I are looking for a new church (again, yet again). I cant say yet where we are moving... If you are the praying type keep us in yours. We're sick of being homeless.
5. I'm going to admit that life is just a bit hard right now. I'm a tiny bit down, and finding it difficult to get back up. It's the rain, and a slight cold, a bit of stress about deadlines and to-do lists mixed in, family drama. I'm trying to take care of myself- taking all the right pills, giving myself a little bit of a housework and parenting perfection break. But I'm also going to reach out a bit.